SELF-DISCIPLINE

The Turkish Language Association defines “discipline” as follows:

• The state of strictly and carefully adhering to the written or unwritten laws and regulations of a community; strict order, system, discipline, control, enforcement.

• The set of measures taken to ensure that individuals conform to the general thoughts and behaviors of the society in which they live.

• The entirety of knowledge that is or can be a subject of instruction, a field of science.

Instead of “Self-Discipline,” the Turkish Dictionary includes the term “Self-Control,” which is defined as:

• The regulation and restriction of one's reactions, behaviors, or tendencies toward another goal in order to achieve a more important objective; self-control.

• The process by which an institution or organization ensures that its operations align with its objectives and standards.

Jiddu Krishnamurti, in the meditation section of his book The Light of Awareness, defines discipline as follows:

“Discipline comes from the word ‘disciple.’ A disciple means a learning mind—not one that learns from a person, a guru, a teacher, or books, but one that learns from observing its own mind, its own heart, and from its own behavior. This learning requires a certain discipline. But this discipline is not about following rules, submission, or formalism. Where there are rules and conformity, there is no true learning. Discipline means learning—learning from daily life, from our relationships, from the depths of the mind... A learning mind is always flexible and active.”

Maintaining self-discipline has become even more challenging for many people today. The intensity of daily life, the acceleration of time, an ever-active mind, and decreased attention spans are among the key reasons for this difficulty.

So, if we realize that we need self-discipline, what steps can we take?

Step 1: Setting a Goal

The first step is to set a goal for ourselves. This goal can be broad and long-term or involve consistent habits over time. In my previous article, I discussed how we can use the SMART Goal Method to set a structured goal and explained how to do so. Those interested can refer to that article for details on goal setting.

Step 2: Breaking Goals into Smaller Steps

To achieve a broad, long-term goal, we need to break it down into smaller, more manageable targets. First, monthly goals should be outlined in a general manner. Weekly goals, however, should be set gradually rather than all at once. The best way to track daily tasks is to create a to-do list every morning. Plans should be realistic and well-grounded. We must recognize our actual capacity and plan accordingly.

At the same time, we should remember John Lennon’s famous quote: “Life is what happens when you’re busy making other plans.” Life is dynamic, and unexpected events can arise. When making daily plans, we should allow some flexibility to accommodate life’s unpredictable dynamics.

Step 3: Rewarding Yourself

At the end of each day, rewarding ourselves for completing our tasks is crucial for maintaining motivation. Keeping up the initial motivation is one of the most critical aspects of the entire process. Celebrating each successfully completed day, week, and month helps reinforce discipline.

Small rewards can include buying ourselves a gift, treating ourselves to a dessert, coffee, or meal at a favorite place, enrolling in a course, attending a theater performance, getting a massage, or dedicating one day a week solely to ourselves.

Once we have created a roadmap and structured everything, the next step is to stick to the program consistently. The most challenging part is cultivating self-discipline from scratch.

Based on my observations, the biggest obstacle to self-discipline is the inability to focus due to distractions. Just as fingerprints are unique, the elements that distract each person also vary. Each individual has a different lifestyle, responsibilities, and routines. It is our responsibility to observe ourselves and identify the barriers on our journey to self-discipline.

From a general perspective, common distractions include electronic device notifications, social media, emails, unfinished tasks, phone calls, spontaneous thoughts, coworkers, family members, pets, mental exhaustion, physical fatigue, stress, emotional fluctuations, unexpected life challenges, and poor time management.

Once we identify our personal distractions, we need to decide how to address them. If working from home, we can designate a quiet space as a work area to minimize interruptions from household noise or pets. If phone use is a distraction, we can mute, turn off, or place it in another room. If we struggle to say no to others, it might be time to learn the art of setting boundaries.

The first step in transforming behaviors or situations is recognizing them. When we become aware of our distractions—such as noticing that we have picked up our phone absentmindedly—we create a moment of choice. In that moment, we can decide whether to continue engaging with our phone or put it down and return to our task. The key to this process is awareness.

Mindfulness exercises and meditation practice can be powerful tools to help us develop this awareness.

Even if you sometimes feel like you are failing, even if you lose hope, do not give up trying! Through awareness of what isn’t working, you will discover how to make it work.

Remember, no effort in this world goes unrewarded.

I wish you all a new year where we wake up each day in good health, peace, happiness, and love, alongside our loved ones. May this be a wonderful year for everyone…