“CONNECTING THE DOTS – A CONSCIOUS DREAM WHILE AWAKE”, PART

Hello dear readers of Varoluş Magazine. In our previous chapter, we explained how the ego and subconscious work, using examples. Now, we will explore the structures that empower the ego, and the mechanisms that allow us to recognize these structures.

One of the most well-known signs of a strengthened ego is its tendency to compare itself to others. This can manifest as seeing oneself as superior—or on the contrary, feeling small and unsuccessful. These structures are shaped in our minds by past experiences, subconscious patterns, and archetypes stemming from the collective consciousness. In other words, the core elements that shape the ego are related to influences found deep within our personality and social context.

Normally, people want to share their views and influence society on topics they believe they are right about. However, the ego doesn’t aim to set an example—it seeks dominance. That’s why the ego tries to prove its views are correct to society or the person in front of it. A healthy ego, on the other hand, expresses itself, listens to the other’s views, gently adds what it feels is missing, and when other perspectives are presented, it respects those different angles. The goal of a healthy ego is to illuminate the subject and find a common ground where everyone benefits.

Let’s consider a scenario:A friend tells you how active they are, how many likes they get on social media, and how everyone has their eyes on them. Over time, this might catch your attention and make you feel inadequate or small. You might start to feel worthless, thinking, “They have so many followers, and I have none,” thus pulling yourself into a familiar emotional pattern.

People who seek respect in society sometimes associate themselves with certain groups. In these groups, to appear strong and “right,” the ego may create divisions in opinion and continue on with a “what I say is right” approach. When the thoughts of such an ego don’t align with those of the group, inner conflicts can arise. The person, in wanting to conform to group pressure, may drift away from their own identity.

Those who overly submit to the influence of family and society might even choose their university majors based on these external pressures. Instead of studying a field aligned with their strengths and talents, they focus on what their families or society want, disregarding their own inner desires. The aim becomes meeting family and societal expectations, gaining their love and appreciation. However, the ego always wants more; thus, the person continually seeks external validation and achievement.

Now, let’s look at a romantic relationship example:Zeynep, who has a healthy ego, decides to live with Ahmet, whose ego is unhealthy. As always, Zeynep will try to maintain her inner peace in this relationship. Ahmet, however, will constantly try to control Zeynep, reflect his own insecurities onto her, restrict her meetings with friends, and continually demand affection.

Zeynep will observe whether Ahmet’s jealousy falls within healthy boundaries of the relationship. To support his inner development, she’ll try to communicate calmly without provoking him. Instead of directly stating that Ahmet has an unhealthy ego, Zeynep will use her awareness to help grow both individuals within the relationship. She will focus on balancing the dynamics in a healthy way, without feeling vulnerable. Saying “You have an unhealthy ego” is not a sign of Zeynep’s healthy ego. On the contrary, she will use her awareness to deepen the relationship and allow mutual growth. We’ve introduced key concepts and provided examples to better understand the Conscious Awake Dream.

What truly matters is not just experiencing the Conscious Awake Dream, but being able to connect it to the whole through the associations it evokes. Even when people are awake, they continue to dream. However, interpreting Conscious Awake Dreams can be challenging with an unhealthy ego, a subconscious filled with trauma, and a mind disconnected from essence—because the noise of the mind prevents us from fully perceiving what’s happening around us.

The ego constantly tries to maintain its familiar cycle by saying, “I’m amazing, I’m worthless, I’m powerful, I’m pitiful.” But a healthy ego allows space to stay present, gives meaning to the messages that come between moments—that is, the Conscious Awake Dream—and fulfills its true function by processing these messages through the conscious and subconscious in connection with the essence, using them to resolve blockages.

A person acting through an unhealthy ego might perceive a different opinion in a meeting as a personal threat. They might get angry, and this internal unrest could make them appear wrong, even if they are right. This person, even though they know the truth, might respond defensively with the wrong tone, causing disharmony with others in the meeting.

In contrast, a healthy ego accepts different perspectives and tries to understand the dynamics behind them. This person is aware that among the views presented, there may be a missing or overlooked angle. Their mind sees that someone else’s thoughts, a moment’s essence, or a broader perspective might be included in those ideas. A healthy ego does not see itself trapped in its own thoughts but recognizes that it is part of the whole—and uses its insights to seek the answers within this whole.

Yes, dear readers of Varoluş Magazine, we’ve reached the end of Chapter 3. In the next chapter, we’ll delve deeper into Conscious Awake Dreams with more examples. We will also explore how ego transforms through self-awareness. Stay with us—we’ll see you in the next chapter. Take care!

Aydın YAKUPOĞLU